Mom says selling her house wouldn't be so bad if she could keep her master bedroom.Moving, however, is one of those chores most people dread. It's a flashback to all the events which occurred in the current place. It's a reminder of your mortality. It's a scary unknown, especially to Americans age 85 and older who make up the fastest growing segment of our population.
The physical demands of relocating are daunting. Distance, career and family obligations often limit helping Mom or Dad during the moving process. Add to this a home where they have resided 30 or more years or an illness or death of a partner and emotions run into astronomical proportions.
Frankly, I've never needed a senior move manager. But that's the direction I'm exploring now that Mom is moving into another exciting phase of her life.
What does a Senior Move Manager do?
According to National Association of Senior Move Managers, they:
Develop an overall move plan
Organize, sort, and downsize
Arrange for profitable disposal of unwanted items
Arrange for shipment or storage
Pack professionally
Unpack in the new home
And take care of other chores, such as cleaning, shopping, etc.
What they can't do, Mom, is arrange for you to cart along your master bedroom to the new location. Sorry.
10 comments:
My next and last move wil be handled by the asst living home--woo hoo
Smart move (so to say!).
My parents, thankfully are still happy and managing fine in the home they've lived in for....yes, over 30 years. I've been encouraging them for sometime now to reduce the amount of 'stuff' they have accumulated over the years. It's a huge and time consuming project, but much better that they do this when they are not in a rush to move and can take the time to enjoy the memories as they sift and sort. It also allows THEM to decide what is and isn't kept instead of someone else deciding for them. Hopefully they will stay put as long as they wish to. Hopefully getting rid of things now will help both in magnatude and trauma if the time comes for them to move to a different living situation...a smaller place, etc. And selfishly, please don't make me go thru everthing when they're gone...it's a really big house!
We are quite the experts in moving.
In our 40 years of marriage we have moved 14 times.
We have one more move to make and then we can truthfully say that we are settled in.
Parents can make our job easier if they sifted through their stuff every now and then. They could then witness the delight (or otherwise!) when they give something they own to someone they care about. I actually felt a sense of relief when I got rid of things I was hanging on to. It made those things I kept all the more precious.
I clicked on the link to 'downsize'. It's great info!
I don't agree with waiting until a home of 30 or 40 years is sold to start the process. Starting BEFORE it's necessary is key. Start when still healthy. No need to rush. No regrets. No accidently throwing out something that was intended to be kept or passed down. A move will still be a big project, but far less stressful and traumatic for everyone.
Dear Andrea,
You are absolutely right to encourage downsizing early on (so long as mom and/or dad agree and it doesn't become a huge issue). I didn't push early enough so mom is feeling super anxious about all she has to do (even with my help!). Even her decisions to give away certain items has become a source for discomfort. Learn from my negligence, folks!
I recently heard about a retired couple that had a family gathering at their home...kids, spouses, grandkids (all grown). During the gathering the couple supplied each kid/spouse/grandchild with post-its and pens. Everyone was asked to put their name on post-its and stick the post-its on something that they would like. The couple has listed all of the items to their future recipient. I'm not sure when they will actually give the items, I'm sure not yet as they plan to stay put for now, but they now know where many items will be passed on.
This may not work for every family, but it seemed to be a great way for this family to approach things.
Very wise and what a happy event for all--the retirees now know what would please each child and the kids and grandkids will remember their parents/grandparent and the event fondly. Did anyone want the dog?
No, but I'm told there was a post-it on the toilet paper.
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